P.S.L.E

Tomorrow is the release of the PSLE results.
Although I didn't fail, somehow because my family's expectations were sky high, I felt like a complete failure.
And my wish for tomorrow is that no kid will feel like this. They won't if their parents stick by them through their times of need.
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In 1994, when my teacher patted my back and said to me , "It's ok Nurashikin...Must make it in secondary school ok.".....

I knew I had flunked in my PSLE exams. (So teachers, tomorrow when you see your kids, please at least let them 'read' their results slip before you give comment okay.)

When I saw my aggregate, I didn't cry. (Must maintain cool in front of friends mah)
All I knew was that I was so doomed.
My parents actually thought that I would outshine my elder brother, Bah who scored 268 for his PSLE. Mine didn't even 'touch' 220.

Mati mati tentu mati.

I remembered walking home so slowly. I felt like a loser.
But you know what made my heart sink to the ground?
The look of disappointment on my mother's face. :(
(Although she has since apologised to me for making me feel that way. Even up till today she feels bad.)
Mom, if you're reading this, don't be. I'm so over it. And I will keep making you feel proud Mom walaupon dah tua bangka.

I hated family gatherings the following year.
The looks my relatives gave me. The unnecessary comments like "Your elder brother too pandai la. Nobody can beat!"
(Yes, even today, my elder brother is still the one. I have my utmost respect for my Bah. Till today, whatever I do, I'll consult him. Sometimes the comments he gives are harsh but they are very constructive. I need that.)

Cut the story short, I worked hard in secondary school... Went to JC....Then NIE.

And I achieved my childhood ambition of being a teacher.

If I knew things would be like this, I would have celebrated my results man.
Sucha waste of negative energy.

Tomorrow will be a jantung- macam- nak -terputus day for my Primary 6 tutees and their parents.

As much as I try to be all relack about it, I must be honest. I am feeling a lil jittery.
Yesterday, I invited my brother's friend, Elisabeth (yes, The Alchemy Pad lady! Hee!) to give a motivational talk to the tutees since she conducts 'Grateful 101' weekly talks. My tutees had fun, and after the inspirational talk, they seemed calm and relaxed.


Elisabeth, thanks so much for spending your precious time with them. Means alot to all of us. :)

Now, I am not worried about their results.
I have done my best and my tutees worked very hard this year.

What I am worried would be their reaction should the results be poor.
And it certainly doesn't help that if they score a 'U' grade for their weakest subject, Maths, REPEAT PRIMARY 6 for them.
That's just our rigid educational system.

"Cher, very malu you know if retain."
"My friends celebrate Youth Day in secondary school..then I still celebrate Children's Day.."
"Teacher's Day, I sure ponteng one. Wait when my friends come back to visit primary school teachers, they show off their secondary school uniform, then I still wear primary school uniform."

My tutees (and any other P6 kids reading this), if you are reading this, I wish you the best tomorrow.
However, if repeat is your fate tomorrow, please take it positively for according to Winston Churchill,

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
Must pluck up that courage to work even harder.

Parents of Primary 6 pupils, if you're reading this,
If their results are good, Congratulations!
If their results are below your expectations but they move on to secondary school and they seem happy with their results, please celebrate with them. :)
If not so good, please put yourself in their shoes and don't make them feel even lousier.
If you turn your backs against them, who are they going to turn to for comfort man? :(

I just want all of you to know that PSLE does not determine one's future and that your children will make you proud...Maybe not now, but definitely later with your constant support, love and encouragement.
In this case, PSLE does not only stand for Primary School Leaving Examination...It also means Parents' Support, Love & Encouragement.
Cheers!